Peter Pan Parody
by wonderful-world-of-disneyxo
Summary: no flames please-i love peter pan just as much as the next disney freak. but this is a piece of entertaining and twisted parody for pure fun :D between k  and T for some false language  barely any but just in case...


This story is about what happens if you become obsessed,

With an older girl who only protests.

But fear not, for Peter Pan never gives up,

Because he does not understand the definition of a break-up.

It all started the day when Pirates Cove Asylum received a letter,

And Peter thought it meant love, because he did not know the meaning of a restraining order.

As giddy as he could ever be,

His obsession for Wendy convinced the ex-boyfriend to flee.

So he packed his bag and went to the exit,

But was stopped with a, "You're not going anywhere, Maggot!"

Captain Hook came stomping down the hall and exclaimed,

"Trying to escape my wonderful asylum? You should be ashamed!"

The two males pulled out their weapons instantly,

And Peter knew his situation became sticky.

Dying to see his beloved Wendy once again,

He convinced himself that his gun was a sword,

And that he was an expert swordsman.

Before the fight could really unfold,

He swung his gun, and knocked Hook out cold.

With nothing to do but run,

He went to get Wendy for some fun.

Once there, he scrambled up her favorite oak tree,

And what he did, you'll have to keep reading to see.

When he saw the Darling car pull away,

He leaped through the window, expecting Wendy to say "Yay!"

Instead he found her asleep,

And unfortunately for her, she dreamed deep.

She did not twitch when Peter stepped inside,

And when he rolled her in a blanket, her eyes did not go wide.

Not until he lifted her over his back,

Did she feel the jolt of her body going slack.

Seeing her captor she started to fight,

But Peter thought she was full of delight!

Excited, he quickly jumped off the window ledge,

And landed in a nearby hedge.

Wanting to seem strong,

He carried Wendy all night long.

Along the way, the girl kept kicking and screaming,

But everyone awake was too busy drinking.

"Where are we going!" Wendy exclaimed.

"Neverland!" the young kidnapper claimed.

In Peter's mind, this Neverland was a magical place,

Where he and Wendy could play games and embrace.

The only place he could think of was Pirates Cove asylum,

But avoiding Hook and his men were the only problems.

In his head he ran through his trusted friends,

The pirates, Indians, and mermaids were out of the question.

The Lost Boys and Tinker Bell, he decided, would help him hide his love,

After all, they treated Peter as if he came from above.

Over the screaming, Peter told Wendy his plan,

And when he used such bizarre words she knew he was a madman.

This young boy Wendy started to pity,

And she decided to play along until the situation got bitchy.

When at the infamous asylum,

Both kids were rather tiresome.

Wendy willingly snuck in through an unknown back door,

Her sense of danger discouraging her to explore.

Instead she and Peter tip-toed to the fourth room down,

Where a little boy opened his door, wearing a raggedy night gown.

Peter ushered his crush inside the depressing dorm,

Where the air was stale, and the temperature lukewarm.

"Hook's after me," he told the kid.

"This time with a gun, he wants me off the grid."

He spoke hastily and softly as he stepped inside,

And little Tootles said in his room they could hide.

But the next day, Hook and his crew suspected trickery,

"Check all the rooms," the Captain told Smee briskly.

Smee was a plump officer from the station down the block,

With determination to get the runaway back into his cellblock.

Sure enough, when Tootles and the rest were in the lunch room,

Peter and Wendy were going to meet their doom.

It was a pretty nurse, who found them, Tinker Bell,

But she was threatened by Hook, who was scarier than hell.

So she beckoned the two youngsters with a voice like bells,

And manipulated Peter, as if putting him under a spell.

But Wendy sensed such a trap and made Peter stay back;

She hated how Tink took advantage of the sanity Peter lacked.

So with a sly smile, the spiteful nurse snapped her fingers.

This was the signal for two men to appear, who silently lingered.

Each one grabbed hold of a resisting child,

And brought them to Peter's rival, who could only smile.

The henchmen let go, and Wendy realized

How happy she was to have Peter at her side.

Peter was silent as he awaited a painful death,

Knowing the only thing worse than his punishment was Hook's breath.

Right on cue, the Captain took out his gun

As he exclaimed, "That's it; you're done."

Little did he know that Tinker Bell was standing nearby,

Who was unaware, until then, of the plan to make Peter die.

She stood in front of the two kids,

While pleading, "This I forbid! Take me instead."

Hook looked one of his crewmen in the eye,

And he got the message to hold the nurse aside.

No need to explain the rest of the story,

Just assume there was no fight, but it was gory.

This is what happens when you act out of love or pity,

There's a 50% chance the outcome will be shitty.


End file.
